The Biggest Loss Of All...
This is by far the hardest entry I've had to write on this blog, and it's a departure from our regular news and views, but we'd appreciate it if you indulged us and read it so you learn a little about the life of a Mets' fan just departed...and maybe save a life of a loved one...
Jonathan Elfenbein, one-half of the original "creative team" of Trades, Tirades & GM Grades, suffered a huge loss yesterday, Sunday, with the passing of his older Brother, Bennett. Ben was only 45, and leaves behind 2 beautiful daughters, Jen & Rachel, a step-son, Joey, who is a great baseball player, as well as his wife, in addition to his beloved niece & nephew, Julia & Matthew. He and Jonathan were as close as 2 brothers can be, and he was also as close as can be with Jonathan's wife, Dana. I had the pleasure of knowing Ben for more years then I can remember, and he had a daily impact on this website. Ben, like Jonathan, is a huge Mets' fan, and rain or shine, his love for the blue & orange never waned. His opinion was expressed to Jonathan daily, and shaped many of Jonathan and my thoughts over the years, influencing how we, in turn, saw things. He was one of those rare individuals that you couldn't help but like immediately- tall, handsome, funny and engaging. He had suffered many losses in his life, but kept a great outlook through it all. When you have someone like him in your life, you can never get over his loss; you can only move forward, as he'd want you to, strong in his memory and all the wisdom and love he left with you.
He won't be here in person to see his daughter begin college in a few weeks, and he won't be with us to see in person how this baseball season winds up. It might seem trite to lump in a baseball season with something as important as a child starting college and the loss of their parent, but it's times like these when we look to the things that give us joy and try to lose ourselves in their embrace. The Mets' haven't exactly been a source of "good times" for any of us in recent times, and it is for that reason that this season is so very rewarding to all of those who have stayed the course and not abandoned the team or the sport during the trying times. Whatever we go through as human beings, we all have our release valves and areas of escape. For most people reading this blog, the Mets are both a release valve and an escape, and when we have seasons like this, we can even add the word "joy" to our venacular. I know that, in this very trying time, Jonathan will be leaning hard on our beloved Mets, throwing himself into boxscores and analysis of game management, wondering how Shawn Green's addition behind David Wright might affect his slump, and, in-between, longing to call his brother to discuss the previous night's game or tomorrow's pitching match-up. We share our love of the blue & orange with our siblings, our parents and our children, (sometimes even our spouses, who usually simply put up with our craziness), and we suffer and cheer together. This sharing is what makes being a fan that much more special, and is the reason that we even started this blog- so that all that we shared on a daily basis via phone and email might actually enrich, in some small way, the life of another Mets' fan. It is also, for that reason, that I am going to post some entries today, as doing so might take my thoughts away from this terrible tragedy and offer some small solace, as it did many years ago, when my grandfather passed away.
Ben's death must also serve as a health warning to everyone reading this- he was only 45, and was working out at the gym when he suffered a massive coronary. Please, if you are reading this, and are over the age of 30, encourage everyone you know to not only get a check-up regularly, but to also have the doctor check your heart and those of your loved ones. They call it the "silent killer" for a reason, and I'm sure no one would want to go through the grief that the Elfenbeins are right now...and I know that if Ben's death helped to save even one life due to early screening, it would simply add to the memory of how great a person he was, and is...
The refrain, "Let's Go Mets" has never been more important to us at Metstrades then it is right now. This season will always have a shadow of sadness hanging over it for us, and it means less and more at the same time...less, because in the shadow of Ben's passing, everything else seems a trivial pursuit...more, because in this trying time, in addition to our loved ones, our faith and our hope, we also look to something as simple and seemingly small as the fate of our beloved blue & orange for strength. Every time, from now until the end of the season, when Delgado hits a huge homer, Wright knocks in a pair, Wagner shuts the door and Reyes blazes around the bases, for us, it will be to honor a memory, to honor the love of a fan, to honor the love of all fans, and, hopefully, eventually, to have some fun again...
With Love & Peace,
He won't be here in person to see his daughter begin college in a few weeks, and he won't be with us to see in person how this baseball season winds up. It might seem trite to lump in a baseball season with something as important as a child starting college and the loss of their parent, but it's times like these when we look to the things that give us joy and try to lose ourselves in their embrace. The Mets' haven't exactly been a source of "good times" for any of us in recent times, and it is for that reason that this season is so very rewarding to all of those who have stayed the course and not abandoned the team or the sport during the trying times. Whatever we go through as human beings, we all have our release valves and areas of escape. For most people reading this blog, the Mets are both a release valve and an escape, and when we have seasons like this, we can even add the word "joy" to our venacular. I know that, in this very trying time, Jonathan will be leaning hard on our beloved Mets, throwing himself into boxscores and analysis of game management, wondering how Shawn Green's addition behind David Wright might affect his slump, and, in-between, longing to call his brother to discuss the previous night's game or tomorrow's pitching match-up. We share our love of the blue & orange with our siblings, our parents and our children, (sometimes even our spouses, who usually simply put up with our craziness), and we suffer and cheer together. This sharing is what makes being a fan that much more special, and is the reason that we even started this blog- so that all that we shared on a daily basis via phone and email might actually enrich, in some small way, the life of another Mets' fan. It is also, for that reason, that I am going to post some entries today, as doing so might take my thoughts away from this terrible tragedy and offer some small solace, as it did many years ago, when my grandfather passed away.
Ben's death must also serve as a health warning to everyone reading this- he was only 45, and was working out at the gym when he suffered a massive coronary. Please, if you are reading this, and are over the age of 30, encourage everyone you know to not only get a check-up regularly, but to also have the doctor check your heart and those of your loved ones. They call it the "silent killer" for a reason, and I'm sure no one would want to go through the grief that the Elfenbeins are right now...and I know that if Ben's death helped to save even one life due to early screening, it would simply add to the memory of how great a person he was, and is...
The refrain, "Let's Go Mets" has never been more important to us at Metstrades then it is right now. This season will always have a shadow of sadness hanging over it for us, and it means less and more at the same time...less, because in the shadow of Ben's passing, everything else seems a trivial pursuit...more, because in this trying time, in addition to our loved ones, our faith and our hope, we also look to something as simple and seemingly small as the fate of our beloved blue & orange for strength. Every time, from now until the end of the season, when Delgado hits a huge homer, Wright knocks in a pair, Wagner shuts the door and Reyes blazes around the bases, for us, it will be to honor a memory, to honor the love of a fan, to honor the love of all fans, and, hopefully, eventually, to have some fun again...
With Love & Peace,
David Rubin
August 28, 2006
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